My Latest Disappointments

My Latest Disappointments

I let myself feel disappointed when I expect certain actions from people.

I strive for positiveness but also try to be realistic.

Being realistic keeps me in check with the “unspoken truth” about things. Sometimes I worry too much about disappointments but they are part of who we are. There are no right or wrongs when dealing with them.

“If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment.”– Henry David Thoreau

I drafted this blog post back in September when the first disappointment happened. I wanted to share a disappointment that occurred. Now, a recent situation made me finish this blog post.

First disappointment

I helped someone go on a business trip. I helped her with all the planning, the logistics, technical issues, and even assisted during the trip because she has never had a trip like this. The trip went well. A few months after the trip we were talking about upcoming opportunities and she mentioned that she bought a souvenir for a friend. This was a huge slap in the face to me.

I never got a thank you but the excitement and sense of accomplishment in her face meant a lot to me. I never expected anything from her.  This was really hard to process. I wanted to address the issue but I just let it go. She has bought things for me on other occasions but this felt different. Maybe I went too dramatic but it felt like a betrayal.

Is not that I expected something but I got really emotional when hearing this. I know that you help people without waiting for anything in return but to me, this was just unfair. It was hard because when I help people I throw all of myself to help them.

Disclaimer

Second disappointment

Then, the story repeats again. I helped another close friend on getting an opportunity that she wanted for a long time. When the opportunity materialized, there were no thank yous for me. She went on celebrating with others and very few people knew how she got the opportunity. This was harder than the first one. I felt the pressure in my chest. I remembered the feeling from the previous disappointment and just let myself cry to try to feel better.

I asked myself, “is it so hard to say thank you? I really don’t expect anything besides a thank you but I feel that you want to be grateful for the people that support you. I am writing this and I feel sad again.

Life continues

Things happen and I am very aware of that. Probably it has happened more than I can remember but these two instances hit me pretty hard.

I am sharing this with hopes that you can deal realistically with situations like this. We help people for different reasons and that is ok. Are we giving ourselves hopes for expecting something in return? Probably.

Would you help these people after what happened? I probably will. But probably not with the same intensity as before. Even though this happened I felt good in a way because my anxiety was not anywhere to be seen. I try to follow my own advice to not let anxiety run my life.

I wish there was a better way to deal with this but at least I am not aware of any. Is all about forgiving, forgetting and moving forward.

How will you handle something like this?

With great hope;

Mayra

 

My Journey as a Stay-at-Home Wife

My Journey as a Stay-at-Home Wife

Last July we moved to Washington because my husband got a new job. As a result, I had to resign from my job in California. Immediately, I started looking for jobs, applied for unemployment and started attending professional events in Washington. This was something that I never thought that I would be doing.

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Attending a Latinas in Seattle event.

Staying at home brought new ideas and gave me more time to work on them. I started my own consulting firm. Looked into new topics for blogging. And I have new sections on the works: Living with Anxiety, Emergency Preparedness, and Product & Service Reviews. Also, I have been trying to be more active in my social channels. I was able to learn a lot through free webinars, free in-person classes, and YouTube. I discovered new abilities hidden in me, I found new passions and I found great joy from being at home.

I did a lot of reflection on our move and in the things we wanted to accomplish in our new place. As I had more time now, I started evaluating and better-organizing things at home.

I became extremely grateful for the food in our table. One day I was having lunch alone at home, reflecting on the job search rejections and in how much my husband was working. As I put the plate in the table I said: “thank you Lord for the food in our table”. Sometimes we feel that the things are just given but we have to work for them. Every time that we eat I feel grateful. And I feel grateful for having a home and for this chance to be doing other things.

I took a closer look at the home finances. I now have the time to pay a closer look at the

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savings, discounts, coupons, offers, etc. I have managed to save around $30 at the grocery store in one trip. Because of the “extra time” we were able to score big discounts on Black Friday. I became more aware of the contents in our pantry and improved my recipes being able to use “everything” before the expiration date. I have done multiple delicious recipes and tried the recipes in the food packaging. Check my Instagram for my cooking progress.

On the learning side, I watched a lot of videos about minimalism, home efficiencies, and how to be more eco-friendly. Because of this, I avoided unnecessary purchases, have been more careful when buying groceries, have analyzed everything that is being brought home and have been looking for additional eco solutions for composting, reducing bottled water usage and buying bulk. These practices have also saved money and helped the planet.

I have been even more supportive of the job my husband does. In the past, we both had complicated schedules. At the end of the day, we would tell each other how busy we were. Know he’s had the time to share even more of the daily challenges he faces at work. I do my best to prepare breakfast, lunch, and dinner for him. And for this, he is extremely happy and grateful.

We have grown as a couple. Is like we grew into another level of maturity. When he has very long days, I wake up with him, prepare breakfast and hang out with him while getting ready for work (sometimes at 4 AM). When possible he comes home for lunch. He has been very thankful for all my efforts to keep him comfortable when coming home from work.

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Thanksgiving decoration

I have been able to meet the community. Being at home gave me the flexibility to help with the community events. We moved in July and in August I was cutting vegetables for a BBQ. Then, I helped with a coloring day, prepared brunch and was even able to decorate for Christmas at the clubhouse. I have been able to visit the library, and this was something that I wanted to do in California and never got the chance. As a result, I have new friends and some new tea buddies.

Finally, I’m very happy for this period. Its been hard so much rejection in the job search and scary trying to start a business. But I learned a lot. I had so much time for networking and have been able to meet really great people. At home, I have never cooked so much in my life, lol. But I have enjoyed it. I loved my husband’s face or texts after he tries the food.

By being more grateful during this time, I have grown a better woman, a better wife, a better professional all because I have had the chance to stay at home. The journey continues for a job, for my own firm and to maintain these new standards that we have been enjoying.

I would have never thought that this opportunity will bring so many good things in our lives. It was certainly not planned but we have been making the most out of it. I am very aware that these things can be done when you are working, I have done some of them. But sometimes we are so focused on our job that the rest went to a second place.

To more opportunities to grow;

Life Postcards